Act I, Scene I

(Beige house with a wooden door. A man in a coat and jeans walks up to the door and searches for the doorbell. He notices there isn’t one, and so uses the brass knocker on the door instead. A girl in her late 20s opens it, wearing casuals)
Man: Good afternoon, is Boots… err, is this Sid Botsliner’s residence?
Girl: (raises her eyebrows) Yes.
Man: Well, hi, my name is Vincent. Is he in?
Girl: (leans against the doorframe and moves her hand to her face) Sid passed away last October.
V: Oh fuck! I’m sorry. I… I used to be in college with him. H… How did it happen?
Girl: Why don't you come in? Where are you coming from?
V: Yeah, thanks. I just drove down from Houston. (They move in)
Girl: Can I get you something to drink… a coke, a fenny or something?
V: Yes thanks, I wouldn't mind a Pepsi… err… (Stops for her name).
Girl: (passes him a can from the icebox) Suzanne.
V: Suzanne… I got your address from a friend of ours, Mack Denver. I didn't know Sid was married.
S: Oh we aren’t…weren't…  never felt the need.
V: You have a lovely place out here. He always said he’d wanted something like this. We all do I suppose, just that Boots was the only one who had the guts to do something about it. Haven't seen him in years. I still can't believe it.
S: That’s Sid for you. We used to talk about it in college.
V: You were in Berkley? Guess I didn't mingle much. Never really knew too many people outside the boarding house.
S: I know what you mean. This all really started back in college, but it wasn't until we all met in Jamaica 5 years after college that we actually decided to make it happen.

Act II, Scene I

(Two young men and a girl, all in their early 20s are sitting on a beach. Sid is lying down on one Umbrella Armchair, Penelope is sitting on the corner of another, looking up at Hugo, who is walking slowly, making patterns in the sand and looking out into the distance.)
B: Well, who the fuck would have thought we’d manage to pull it off?
H: We did. We knew we would.
P: Actually, You think we’ll be the only ones?
H: If I know Mack he’d want to be here.
B: He said he would. I bumped into him at The Hilton in Boston, a few months ago. And Ally’ supposed to be flying in too.
P: When did you last hear from her?
B: I got a mail form her 3 days ago. She seemed pretty excited about it.
H: I think that’ll be the lot. Nobody ever really took it seriously.
P: We’ll soon find out.
B: We are the only ones who followed our passions.
H: Ah! Back to our ‘oh-so-superior’ selves. But seriously, our real dream still lies ahead.
P: Isn't this supposed to be the test? The test of your resolves. (in a glorifying manner, with an ever so subtle hint of  sarcasm)
B: We still know all that we did then, perhaps more. Nothing’s really changed. We’ve just lived a little more.
H: And that little was enough to strengthen my resolve thank you.
B: Is your life really that mundane? You are doing what you thought you wanted to.
H: Yes, but after some time you realise that all the world’s really a stage, and all the men and women merely actors. Especially the ones in the theatre circles.
B: It is their business.
P: Yes, but they make it their lives. Everything is so over-dramatised.
H: Rather pseudo, if you ask me. Everyone is leading such unreal lives.
B: And no one knows how the play ends.
H: What was that line from our college play? “That fool stage manager said we can’t leave till we’ve finished the play”.
B: Are we talking about the lord, thy God here?
P: Hey look… is that Ally? (Points into the distance)
H: Yeah, but who’s with her?
(Ally and MC enter stage)
P: Look’s like… hello, it is… Maggi Chester!!!
M: All 55 kilos of her.

A: Hi Penny!!!
H: You’ve lost weight.
P: How’ve you been?
B: The mean club is in session again.
A: Great. Helllooo??
H: Hi Ally.
P: So Maggie, I heard you got married.
B: Did she say marred or married?
M: Yeah, and I heard you didn’t.
H: We decided we’d rather not be married and wonder why we didn’t get married than get married and wonder why we did.
P: Talking about wondering, would somebody mind wandering in with me. I’m dying to get a chocolate brownie.
A: Yep. We’ll just be back.
(P & A exit into a shack on the beach)
M: (Shouting out to them) Mujhe bhi brownie chahiye.
B: So Maggie, who’s the lucky guy you finally decided to marry?
H: If I know Maggie, luck had nothing to do with it.
M: Well, if you must ask, I finally did marry Barry Astaire.
B: The cute guy in your sister’s class you used to tell us about?
H: Astaire? Barry Astaire? The talk show host?
M: That’d be him.
B: Hugo, one would think that you wouldn’t want to come home from a life of acting and watch the tube.
H: Oh, I do watch the occasional talk show, and Barry Astaire is quite a killer.
B: Well, Maggie would know that.
M: Yeah, I’ve caught a few of his shows too.
H: One would think so. And what is Mrs. Maggie Astaire doing with her life?
M: Didn’t you guys know? I quit my job after the twins were born. They’re quite an armful. And it’s still Maggie Chester.
B: That’d be her. Independent but attached. Why didn’t he come?
M: He couldn’t. (Smiles wickedly) I wouldn’t have brought him even if he could. What have you been doing with your lives?
B: He’s still acting the fool (H gives him a glare). I, meanwhile, have been flitting from tree to tree like a flying squirrel. Advertising, journalism, photography, even thought I’d like to be a psychiatrist.
H: But then he realised he’d always been a quack.
M: Quite paradoxical for a man who’s life’s ambition used to be to do nothing. Still dreaming about that?
H: Oh yes! We want nothing more than we want nothing.
M: I’d love to do nothing, if I only I had the time.
B: To do nothing?
M: Hell yes! You need to do a lot to do nothing. Can I bum a fag from either of you?
H: No, we’re not fags anymore. Don’t you remember we quit together?
B: Well hell, we started together.
M: I don’t light up around the house. Not with those two devils around… make that three devils. I just have the occasional smoke to relax once in a while. Same reason you (looks at B) change jobs.
B: Yes, and probably as often too.
M: Oh my God! There’s a man in a  coat and tie on the beach.
B: Freaked out! One of ours?
H: I should hope not. What’s he selling?
B: It’s Mack!!! Trust him.
(Mack Denver enters stage)
B: Mack m’boy. Give us a kiss. How’s it hanging?
D: Oh, I’m hanging in there. Hi Maggie.
M: Hi Mack D. Didn’t think you’d turn up.
D: Neither did I. But then I said I would. You forget who was responsible for bringing you all here the first time.
B: (sarcastically) yeah right!
M: Well, he is right.
H: So what? We’re not going to give him credit for changing our lives.
B: Yeah, so what if he’s changing millions of others.
D: I think I have jet lag. Aa ja sote hain.
B: For a spiritual stud, you’re one hell of a sleepy bugger.
(P & A enter stage)
P & A: (in conjunction) Mack D!
H: You make him sound like a burger joint.
B: Only it’d have to be Veg Burgers. That’d be a first.
A: Look who we found. (gestures behind her as Roger, Jenny and Kenneth Gates enter stage)
(A lot of his and hugs and hearty handshakes. You can hear voices above the din)
H (to R): Heard you guys got married.
J: And divorced.
A: I always said two Brits should never get married to each other.
B: Or to anybody else for that mater.
J: Just shut up.
K: (imitating her) Just shut up, and like, generally, stuff it.
M: Mujhse bhi baat karo.

(Heard above the volume of voices)
H: Well, we’re here, somebody say something.
A: Roger, you’re so cute (pinches his cheeks).
R: (makes a face) Bartender! Get me a beer.
B: And get me drunk.
M: And can I have some sex on the beach?

Curtain


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